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The Epstein Files
Instant PDF Download. Print Coloring Pages at Home.
Welcome to the most relaxing way to stare directly at the American judicial system without screaming into a pillow.
Instant Download PDF
No shipping, no waiting. Just download.
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6 coloring pages
You get six 8.5 x 11 inch coloring pages in one print-ready PDF.
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print at home
Print whenever and wherever you want. Mess up? Print another.
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Look Inside the Coloring Book
Download the coloring book that proves the bad guys always win in the end. Get ready for a journey through sealed files, corrupt justice, and some very powerful people!
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Page 1:
The Mile High Immunity Club
Our story begins with a group of rich and powerful men sharing a laugh and a drink on a private jet. They're heading to a tropical island where the age of consent is for poor people.
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Page 2:
Witness Removal Program
A stack of cash buys the premium "Oopsies, We Had Technical Difficulties" package. It includes cameras malfunctioning and security guards napping while the problem fixes itself.
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Page 3:
Just Shred It
The cleanup starts when the paperwork reaches Trash Patel for proper archiving. The paper shredder goes "brrr" and the felonies go away. His boss hands him a stack of cash for being a good boy.
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Page 4:
Above the Law
Corruption takes a village, so his colleague $cam Blondi does her part over at the Department of Corruption, meticulously redacting the flight logs until the only thing legible is the word "suicide."
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Page 5:
burn the evidence
Once all the documents are properly filed into oblivion, the team gathers around a fire that's burning the only list of names that could actually drain the swamp.
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Page 6:
nothing to see here, folks
This brings us to the grand finale where we learn that the American justice system isn't just blind—it's been blindfolded and propped up on a mountain of cash.
Hurry up & download the files before justice is found dead in a jail cell with the cameras turned off!
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